Seriously, Who Comes Up With These Things?

So if you haven't heard there's a new browser-based free-to-play (at the start) game called Miss Bimbo. The game revolves around creating a virtual "bimbo" that the player has to purchase food and accessories for, maintaining a certain weight and height in order to be "the most popular bimbo". The game is marketed to young girls (tweens) and has gotten a large amount of press, particularly for the option to have plastic surgery and breast enhancement within the game.

Here's The Guardian's take on it.

Feministing's (The most professional "extreme" feminist site I've come across) article. You have to scroll down to find it since they don't let you link directly to their articles.

And last, but not least, Leigh Alexander's via GameSetWatch take on it. I especially appreciate the comparison with GTA that occurs towards the end of the article (girls aren't the only ones who face unrealistic expectations).

Honestly, I agree with each of these articles, and while I believe that Leigh Alexander's take to be the most "adult", I'm not sure if I would let my daughter play this game. Perhaps if it had taken a sarcastic approach, helping girls realize how absurd their ideas of what the world expects them to look like really are, then this wouldn't bug me. But as it stand, a game where being the biggest bimbo is a good thing just seems rotten to the core to me.

I Got To Work On My Module!

Egads! Time really snuck up on me today, though I kind of expected it to, what with starting a new game (Zelda: Twilight Princess - really been meaning to play this game just because I've heard so little about it, Michael Abbot's "The Brainy Gamer" recent discussions on the Zelda series (Part 1, Part 2, Part 3) solidified my resolve) and finally getting to work on my module.

I've decided for my module that rather than going through and creating options for every character archetype in each of the dialogues, I would instead have a sort of personality quiz at the start of the module which would determine the "path" that your character will follow. Unfortunately this meant that I had to spend the better part of the day coming up with the questions, coming up with answers, and creating a matrix of all of the possible permutations and deciding what each one should mean.

Still, I finally got to work on my module again!

Additional random link: Study finds that sleep-deprived women are grumpier than similarly deprived men. Personally I wonder whether the women become grumpier from being sleep-deprived, or if they become sleep-deprived because they're grumpy.

P.S. Attended Sakuracon dressed as the Moonlight Knight (roommate went as Tuxedo Mask). I'll post pictures and impressions when I get around to it, which hopefully means this week if homework isn't too demanding and I don't forget.

My Brain Feels Like Runny Egg-Yolk

I just watched Kings of Power 4 Billion % and it absolutely destroyed my mind. I do not recommend this movie if you are: squeamish, a non-gamer, dislike atonal music, or have any sort of problems with epilepsy.

For everyone else, go and watch it so you can discuss how absurdly ridiculous and positively disturbing of a movie it is.

If you really want to know why this post is so short, just watch the movie and you'll know.

How Did I Not Realize This

Lately I've been noticing small little details in games a lot more; little things like how a character's eyes will follow objects that they can interact with, or idle animations have caught my eye more and more. I think I'm starting to realize how little, in games at least, the big picture matters if these little things are ignored.

It really shouldn't surprise me; I've known for quite a while that Shigeru Miyamoto will have a special garden-esque area created for his Mario games where he can just run around and see how things feel, make sure that jumping on a goomba feels appropriately squishy and springy. Yet it wasn't until now that I truly understood how important for a game it was to get this, "tactile" feeling. If a game doesn't respond the right way, doesn't feel right, or looks odd, I lose interest.

It reminds me a lot of the "uncanny valley" problem that digital artists are running into when trying to model faces. Things look similar enough that you notice the lack of details and it makes it look "off". The same thing happens in games when a character doesn't look at who he's addressing, or when the controls don't match what's happening on the screen; you can't quite describe what's wrong, but you know that it is."

Now that I think about it, I can't come up with a video game that I like that has this kind of problem, where things don't feel right. Even Chaos Legion, a game that in all respects classifies as "mediocre", everything still feels right.

The devil really must be in the details.

Day In Summary

Why there isn't a real post today:

8:30 A.M. - Wake up and start studying for exam at 12:30
9:20 A.M. - Go to class to find out it's been canceled
9:30 A.M. - More studying
12:20 P.M. - Head to exam
1:50 P.M. - Have lunch and start doing homework
3:00 P.M. - Start writing post
3:15 P.M. - Find this and this online by the same guy who did this (warning do not watch unless you are prepared for absurd action sequences involving sexy video game girls)
3:30 P.M. - All previous thoughts rendered useless
8:00 P.M. - Go shoot down terrible short stories
9:00 P.M. - Ah fuck I'm going to be writing this at 1 again aren't I?

There's a lot more in between, but those movies really destroyed any coherent thought I had for the rest of the day. Honestly, I'm just glad I saw them after my exam.

Why Can I Never Write These During The Day?

Back from my break and boy do I feel rested and relaxed, and by that I mean I feel stressed about my test for tomorrow and I'm writing this post at one o'clock in the morning. In all seriousness, this break did me a world of good. The break relaxed and recharged me, and I got a lot of good advice and ideas for my future. However, one thing I noticed over the break, which was especially apparent at the Chuck panel at Paley Fest (more on that tomorrow), was how foreign gaming culture and it's references are to most people. I've been thinking a lot about this idea lately, so expect a few more posts in the next couple of days.

Until tomorrow, good night.

Taking A Break

I'm taking a brief hiatus for Spring Break to recharge my batteries, as I'm barely able to write this post. Basically last week all of the UPS campus "hit the wall" in a general fashion and it's become a common to see students curled up on benches or next to piles of books sleeping. I'll be back posting by next Monday, until then have a fun weekend!

I'm Not Even Sorry

Homework and Balloon Invasion means no post for tonight.

Poetry?

So I randomly came up with this poem while trying to write a sonnet for my poetry class:

He beats me up,
Puts me down,
Picks me up,
Then makes me frown.

He makes me laugh,
Makes me cry,
Gives me half,
Then makes me want to die.

He's my hero,
My greatest foe,
I'm nothing but a zero,
Compared to my big bro.

I'm not exactly sure why I've been thinking about my brother lately, but this is the result. Also, I'm not done talking about yesterday's subject and plan to continue discussing it when I have the time to give it a proper treatment.

P.S. 4 days until brawl.

One Foot Forward...

And another step back. I always find it funny that when women aren't allowed to do something or go somewhere, it's sexist, but when it happens to a man it becomes progress.

As a man, over the course of my life I have been asked to think of things from a woman's point of view more times than I can count. "Imagine yourself as a woman in 13 century France," "imagine yourself as a woman in Victorian England." Never have I been in a class where we were asked, "Imagine yourself as a large, sweaty viking in 7th century Sweden." While there are exceptions to this, in my experience, this one-sided way of thinking and being taught has led to surprisingly large lack of knowledge about men and the male experience in women today.

Don't believe me? Last year in my Literature By Women class, I and the two other males in the class had to explain to the entire class (of 34) the concept of "urinals". Perhaps my favorite quote comes from a shy girl who timidly raised her hand and asked, "So it's like a trough?" I then proceeded to tell her that troughs are in fact used in many restrooms, particular at sports arenas. This is in no way the only case of a lack of knowledge about the male experience I have encountered in my time at UPS. It is, in fact, bad enough that I have been working on a lecture on manliness as a concept, as of the the women I have polled on this campus, none of them have understood it.

I don't have any more time to talk today, but I'll be back tomorrow to continue this subject. If you're really good and leave some comments I may even have a teaser of my lecture on manliness. Also I apologize for the shittiness of these past two posts, I haven't had the time to write posts that I normally enjoy, which allows for things like proofreading.

P.S. 5 days until brawl.

Let Me Count The Ways...

Today I realized just why I love Threads of Fate as much as I do. For those unfamiliar, Threads of Fate is a PS1 action RPG with two playable characters that each have their own intertwining storylines. With that out of the way, there are three reasons I love Threads of Fate.

First off is the music, which is of production values high enough that it takes you aback at first. Honestly, the music is so well done it seems almost jarring against the PS1-era polygonal graphics.

Second is the brisk pace at which the game moves; even accomplishing all of the side quests you can get through the game in a couple of sittings.

Third, and I think most important, is the fact that nothing you do in that game is useless. Killing useless monsters nets you both MP and coins that can be turned into money, which can they be used to by permanent stat upgrades. Getting hit increases your hp, and using magic does the same for your mp. Honestly, as long as you aren't just running in circles outside of combat in this game, you are accomplishing something. Tack on New Game+, which lets you keep all of your stats from before, and you have a game where even losing a boss fight has a use.

All of these features, plus interesting characters and a narrative that never reveals too much, and you have got yourself a gem of a title.

P.S. 6 Days until Brawl.

Will You Be My Player 2?

As a child I watched my brother play games from afar, always intrigued by what he was doing on the NES, but not clever enough to grasp the complexities of his favorite titles, Pirates! being perhaps his most cherished. As I grew, however, I learned how to play on my own. My skills increased greatly, but I still felt that urge to watch him at work.

As my skills increased even more, watching became less desirous; I wanted to play with my brother. Early 2-player titles like Mortal Kombat curbed that desire somewhat, but I still felt "off". It seemed odd that in order to have fun in a video game with my brother I had to play against him, which could only end with my defeat or his. Neither of these conclusions seemed best to me, and I wondered if it was possible for us both to enjoy the spoils of victory together.

It was during this period of conflict in my life when some wise soul purchased Secret of Mana for the Super Nintendo Entertainment System (SNES). Secret of Mana is an extremely unique title; it was one of the first action-rpg's, but that pales to the fact that a second or even a third player could plug in a controller and take control of one of the three protagonists, the boy, the girl, and the sprite.

Imagine if you will, that you are a little kid whose role-model is his bigger brother. Got it? Now imagine that you are this same child and someone gives you a key that takes you and your brother to a magical world where the two of you have to work together in order to become heroes and save this world.

I was in heaven.

I became so enamored with this game that I pestered my brother to play it with me every single day. My brother eventually grew disinterested in the game, and while he humored me for the most part, he played less and less as time went on. Eventually my requests to play became irritating to him, and I had to ask him in nicer and more obtuse fashions. It grew to the point where I could no longer even mention the game's title, referring to it instead as S.O.M. Finally, one day, he stopped playing the game entirely.

My brother and I still played games together, and if a game had the words "Co-op" or "2-Player" on the box we would almost always pick it up. We had fun with these games, but it was never that same kind of journey as Secret of Mana once held for me. As we grew up my brother's attention shifted away from video games, while I grew to love them more and more.

The years passed and I grew interested in Secret of Mana once again; the desire to finally beat it expanded within me. In my spare time I played, and soon enough I was rewarded with the end credits.

I was happy that I had finally beaten the game that truly inspired my love for video games, but I couldn't get over the feeling of sadness that the end had instilled in me. During the final sequences, the boy, in order to save the world, seals away all of the magic in the world, so his ally, the sprite, is forced to leave his friends forever as he is a part of that magic. The final shot of the boy and the girl overlooking the mana tree had me in tears.

My brother always played as the sprite.

I love my brother, he is one of the greatest people I have ever had the privilege of knowing. He was an amazing friend to me as I grew up, and an even better brother.

One day I hope to sit down and beat Secret of Mana with him.

Together.