I Hate Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day has always held a special place in my heart, mind you, it is the part of my heart that died long ago and has been warped by its own hatred and depression into some kind of demon that you fight in one of the Shadow Hearts games, but it does have its place. My near-undying hatred of this joyous occasion stems from the fact that I have never had someone special to celebrate it with, and it also comes slightly too close to my birthday so it always sneaks up on me (usually ruining my good that's left over from my birthday).

However, this Valentine's Day was different, for I had a date. I spent most of the morning today worrying about said date, and pondering how I felt about finally having a date on Valentine's Day. I eventually came to the conclusion that I was happy with the idea, and was thus excited, and of course nervous, for the date itself. I met the girl and we talked, things were going pretty well, I was talking a bit more, but she had just got off work so I had expected that, but then something odd happened. Thirty minutes into my date I realized that I was bored, not excited, not nervous, not cheery, bored.

The conversation was flowing smoothly, as we were both fans of France and Football (European or Soccer) and so we were talking pretty excitedly about that, and it's not like she wasn't cute, but I was still bored. I'm not being clear enough on what this means I suppose, so I'll clarify a bit. I don't get bored. I can sit grinding the same enemies in a video game for hours, killing the same things, with the same moves, on and on. For those who don't play games, in your browser open a new window, then close it, continue doing this for several hours. I don't get bored doing this, so when I say that I got bored while talking to this cute girl about a subject that I interested in, you know that something is definitely wrong. Perhaps it was because she didn't seem terribly interested in me romantically, maybe it was because I just didn't know her well enough, but I just couldn't shake this feeling, and when we decided to part ways I realized I didn't care if I never saw her again.

This whole experience has changed my outlook of this holiday quite a bit, but for now at least, I'm going to keep it locked up in that cold-place in my heart. Also great Valentine's Day themed article
from Leigh Alexaner (Sexy Videogamegirl and the woman who's writing I am in love with). I really want to write a love story right now, so expect me to keep talking about love and relationships for the next couple of days (I might even post tomorrow and Saturday!. Also excuse the general insanity of this post, I'm still working through how I feel about this whole affair in general, expect more coherency in my next post.